The Awesome Responsibility of Homeschooling

I realized today that, since they don’t hang out with their peers for eight hours a day, my kids may miss out on some things – like corny grade school jokes. However, as a dedicated homeschool mom, I decided to step up and fill that void. Today’s lesson:

What did the car say when its tire fell off? You picked a fine time to leave me, loose wheel (which my kids actually get, since we listen to the country oldies station every so often)

What flowers grow between your nose and your chin? Tulips!

Of course now I must prepare myself for the constant daily re-telling of these jokes (it has already begun – Sam’s repeated that first one to me three times already, apparently forgetting that I was the one who taught it to him!)

Knock knock jokes, however, are still a little beyond them (just ask them to tell you the Tinkerbell joke). They are apparently slightly punchline impaired (can’t imagine where they get that from!)

Quotes of the Week

Walking down the driveway to get the mail with Naomi, I told her she looked beautiful. “Yup” she replied “I’m always going to be beautiful because I’m always going to smile. I’m never going to be crabby again!” (we tell all of our kids that a smile is what really makes someone beautiful).

***

I was particularly Ecclesiastes-minded (“Everything is Meaningless”) last Saturday evening (I want to say “Ecclesiastical” but that means something very different! ) Anyway, I was moping and wallowing in thoughts that “nothing I do really matters!” I decided I was going to send the kids to the Lutheran school in Rice Lake, plow under the garden and plant grass, have all the chickens butchered, and serve only pre-packaged meals from Walmart. I told Peter that last one, and he replied, “If you do that, I will leave you.” Thanks to the weirdness that is me, that really cheered me up – he really does appreciate me!

(and after seeing that the tuition for the Lutheran school is $2,500 per kid, I felt even better – think of all the homeschool materials I could buy with that much money!)

***

Then yesterday afternoon, after watching part of a sappy Jane Austen movie, I asked the kids, “Who has a hug for me?” I was immediately mobbed and Sam said, “I’ll always have a hug for you.” Not to be outdone, Hannah said, “I have millions of hugs for you, Mom! I’ll always hug you, even when I’m a grownup.” And Naomi chimed in with, “I have INFINITY hugs! And kisses too!”

It’s good to be loved!

It’s a Musical!

Ok, I know it’s been almost two weeks (Kirsten yelled at me again ) but really, not too much has been going on.

I’ve had the CD player going since lunch, and the songs have been kind of reminding me of some things that have been going through my mind this week, so I’ll use them for jumping-off points:

One of the songs from the Amazing Grace soundtrack (the movie about William Wilberforce) is a version of Peace Like a River (aka It Is Well With My Soul) (which, if you’re not familiar with it, is a song written by a man after his wife and children were killed on a trans-atlantic crossing when their ship sank). The song talks about how he’s found peace because he knows God is in control. The second verse always gets me:

My sin - oh the bliss of this glorious thought – my sin, not in part but the whole, is nailed to the tree and I bear it no more – praise the Lord, praise the Lord, oh my soul!

(and yes, I’m tearing up again just writing that!)

That song, or at least that verse, is particularly fitting considering my mood last weekend, which reflected anything but “It is Well With My Soul!” It’s a bit of a long story, but I’ll sum up – I had been planning to butcher my old rooster, Dandelion. This was causing me a lot of stress all week, partly because the kids were upset about it, and partly because I’d never butchered anything before and I would have to do this all by myself, with only directions off the internet (and a brief phone call toward the end of the process to my Dad, who has eviscerating experience  – thanks Dad!). Peter begrudgingly took the kids to Trevor’s for the morning, and I set to work. It took me two hours (including almost an hour to set everything up). Honestly, it wasn’t so bad. But still the whole nervous week before did me in, and I was useless for the rest of the afternoon, willfully crabby and worn out. This is the one sin that gets me most often – knowing I have no reason to be mad, and that it’s not what God wants from me, but still stubbornly clinging to my anger.

Thankfully, the next day was Sunday, and even though I was crabby all morning, four hours of fellowship and focus on God finally broke me out of my funk. I love my church!

So when I hear that verse, it makes me think of how, even though I’m stubborn and ungrateful and stupid so often, Jesus still loved me and died for me, and wants me with him in heaven. Not because of who I am or anything I’ve done, but just because he’s so great. And all of that guilt and frustration is washed away so I’m free to give glory to HIM!

***

Next song (not nearly so spiritual): Remember When by Alan Jackson. This song makes me cry every time when it gets to the line: “Remember when/the sound of little feet/was the music/we danced to week to week.” It makes me stop and remember that this is the best part of life, being part of shaping these little lives, of getting to teach them about life and loving God, with all of the little joys and frustrations that go along with that.

I should mention that that song and the country songs following are on a CD Jessica made for us, out of the blue (that’s just how she is!), last year. I found it on the shelf this morning and pulled it out, and it’s still good!

***

Next song: When You Say Nothing at All (the Alison Krauss version). This one reminds me of Jessica’s upcoming wedding, for which I’m at work making dresses for the girls. I am a little intimidated, because I’ve only made one set of dresses for the girls, and that was for Easter this year, and because Jessica seems to think that I’m some kind of awesome seamstress that can do anything! I looked at the pattern, and it doesn’t seem to difficult, but I’m still sort of nervous. But, the fabric and pattern are bought, the wedding is just over a month away, and so I bit the bullet this morning and cut out the pieces for Hannah’s dress. I’m supposed to be sewing it right now while the babies are sleeping (but it’s so much easier to procrastinate by putzing on the computer . . .) 

***

Next song: Alyssa Lies (I have no idea who sings it). This is one of those forgettable activist songs, about a little girl who’s new friend is being abused by her parents. In true country-song style, it starts out saying that Alyssa lies about her bruises, and then in the last verse it changes to “Alyssa lies/with Jesus/because there’s nothing/anyone would do.”

What does this have to do with me? Twice in the last month a friend of mine, in her blog, has called things I purposefully do in my parenting “borderline abuse.” First, it was because I believe it’s important for people (not just kids) to face their irrational fears and overcome them (the example was of a little girl she saw who didn’t want to get in the water for swimming lessons – a situation I would probably not be in because of course I would be teaching the child myself, at our own pace – but still I would not let the child’s fear control the situation, I would help the child work through it) and then this week she attacked Babywise (which is akin to blasphemy in the Westendorf household!). Apparently, letting your baby cry herself to sleep (when her other needs are attended to – obviously you’d make sure she had a clean diaper and she wasn’t hungry) is abusive. Never mind that the child will never learn to put herself to sleep without having a chance to do it! And never mind that a mother who is nursing her baby every two hours would never be able to deal with the four other children demanding her time all day (not only because she’s obviously not getting enough sleep!) And of course there’s no way she can keep up her milk supply if she’s exhausted all the time . . .

But I’m getting carried away. I will put up my five happy, healthy, obedient (ish ;) ) Babywise babies up against any “attachment parenting” babies any day. More than once, I’ve been told my kids are remarkable for their kindness and obedience, and I think a huge part of that is because I started them out with Babywise. A kid needs to know from the get-go that their parents will take care of their needs, and that crying does not get them what they want. Some people say, “Yeah, but two weeks is a little young to teach them that!” but I say, let them know from the get-go; otherwise you get into habits that are hard to break (for both you and them) when they ARE old enough to learn it.

Of course, it all sounds so harsh – but the iron fist has to be balanced with a soft hug and an infectious giggle whenever possible!

***

Ok, on to a happier song – She’s Everything to Me by Brad Paisley.

Ah, Brad Paisley. Not only does he have a great sense of humor (“Ticks” will always be on my top ten list, not least of all because Peter thinks it’s hilarious, and shows his dimples when that song comes on – I love Peter’s dimples!), but he can do sappy songs, too, without skipping a beat. 

Plus of course he’s adorable! But alas, we’re both married . . .

***

Next song – Whiskey Lullaby performed by Brad Paisley (again! Yay!) and Alison Krauss

This song reminds me of the truth that not everything that sounds sweet, or is presented by people we like, is a good thing. I love the tune, and I really like both of the artists, but the song glorifies things that are not worthy, and so subtly insinuates a worldly point of view and undermines my focus on God’s truths. It reminds me to be on the watch for the Angel of Light who turns out to be the Devil (2 Corinthians 11:4).

***

The next song is Jesus Take the Wheel – which always makes me laugh, because it makes me think of the parody song “Cletus Take the Reel” by Tim Hawkins ( http://www.timhawkins.net/ ) Good stuff!

But the song also annoys me, because it typifies what I call “Country Music Christianity” – which takes “feel good” bad theology and popularizes it (like “Holes in the Floor of Heaven” – people in heaven are not concerned with us on earth, they are basking in God’s glory! God himself is watching out for us, not dead people!) Ah, well. Just another example of “American Christianity” garbling what God really says . . .

Ok, the baby is crying, so I must go comfort him immediately (gag me!) – but it is time for him to get up, so I’d best go check on his diaper and give him his bottle.

Oh, and here’s one more I heard on the radio the other day (the country station was playing Toby Keith (yuk!) so I switched to the pop station) – it was about a girl who’d broken up with her guy, but still held his memory in her heart. The tag line was: “you’ll always be with me, just like a tattoo”

Deep.

Sleepover fun

This weekend I got the chance to go down to Joel & Kirsten’s and have a sleepover with just Hannah and Naomi – the other kids stayed home with Peter. Can you just see the blissful smile on my face??? No diapers for me to change, no bottles, no scheduling everything around naptimes, no watching every moment to make sure the baby isn’t eating something he’s not supposed to – now that’s a vacation!

I should make clear that there was a baby around - cute, chubby Logan – but I was only “aunty” and not “mommy” – and that makes a world of difference! I actually got to sit and read a book, with nary a child in sight, for more than five minutes without interruption! Joy unspeakable!

But that’s not all – besides the relaxing baby-less-ness, there was also lots of older-kid fun! We left home Saturday morning and arrived in Rushford just in time for lunch, and after lunch Joel, Kirsten, and I, with only five kids total (yay!!!), and only one of them under age four (double yay!) headed to the “Rushford Aquatic Center” (otherwise known as the city pool). There were only two other kids there, and Kirsten was good friends with the lifeguard, so we were free to play to our heart’s content. I was actually able to have one-on-one time with each of my girls for a little swim instruction (they still need a lot of work, but they’re making progress!) and some time to actually swim myself (which I don’t think I’ve done since before Sam was born!). AND I only got a tiny bit sunburned!

When we got home it was time for the tea party (what’s a girly weekend without a tea party?) Evin was too stubborn to dress up, and the Moms had no appropriate attire that still fit after the widening effects of mommyhood, but Lauren, Hannah, and Naomi donned fun dresses (and we moms wore our feather boas with aplomb, if I do say so myself) and we all ate cucumber sandwiches and almond tea cakes (made by yours truly) with pinkies proudly raised. (For the record, I’m only posting that *fabulous* picture of Kirsten because she was threatening to post one of me on her blog )

After the tea party it was practically time for supper (this was to be a constant snacking kind of weekend). Joel was grilling burgers and corn on the cob – yum! Unfortunately, just after he finished the burgers, and with corn on the grill, Kirsten looked up from her computer (where she was looking up homeschool stuff with me ) and through the window spotted a fox making off with one of her chickens.

Pandemonium ensued, with Kirsten running out the door barefoot, screaming madly, into the pasture, where the fox had dragged the hen under a jumbled pile of old mink pens (their back yard used to be a mink farm, which they are in the process of disassembling). I came out (with shoes, and the iron campfire poker, which was the only weapon I could find on short notice) and gave her the “weapon”, with which she fished out the poor bird, shortly before Joel walked out with the shotgun, manfully irritated at his thoughtless wife: ”Now you’ll have to sacrifice another chicken before I can get a shot at it.” True, but Joel, she couldn’t help it – she just wanted to protect her chicken!

Well, that put a damper on things, and while Kirsten was getting the rest of the chickens safely in the coop and dealing with the dead bird (see – it’s not just me!) Joel and I fed the kids. I should probably mention that for some reason Joel decided he needed to bake that night, and so, concurrent with grilling supper, he baked a batch of monster cookies (the “small” recipe makes about 50 cookies), a pan of mounds bars, and two pumpkin pies. The guy loves his desserts

By this time it was pushing 8, so I had the kids put on their jammies and brush their teeth, and then sent them off to the girls’ room to play while the adults were going to play board games. That was the plan, anyway. Before we even sat down, Kirsten got a phone call which took a good half hour, and then her Mom & Dad dropped in for something, and by the time Kirsten came into the living room, Joel was lying on the floor snoring and I was halfway through a magazine. Needless to say, we did not play any board games that night!

A little after nine o’clock Hannah sheepishly came into the living room and asked for her blankie. I pulled out hers and Naomi’s, and their pillows, and gave them to her, and also mentioned that since it was a sleepover they didn’t really need to go to sleep yet. Her eyes got very wide, and she asked, “How late can we stay up???” I drew the line at ten, and sent her upstairs, where I could hear her exultantly sharing the news with Naomi and her cousins

The next morning even Logan slept in, and I got up at seven (I had been warned that there might not be hot water for a shower after 8am). When I came out of the shower, the girls were up, but Joel was still manfully guarding the bed ;) After a quick breakfast of banana oatmeal chocolate muffins (eaten on the porch, with legs dangling off the edge, snuggled up against me for warmth) the girls went out to play in the chilly morning air, and Hannah even tried riding Lauren’s old bike (without training wheels!) My girls always make me laugh – Hannah is always asking Naomi to help her when she gets stuck, and on this occasion I got to see four-year-old Naomi holding six-year-old Hannah’s bike seat, chanting, “Steady . . . steady” and Hannah crying, “Don’t let go!” Who is the older sister here???

Once we had Joel up and going it was time for church. This weekend we were in for a special treat – church at “The Bowl” It was about 20 minutes south of Rushford, in a town called Bratsburg (what an unfortunate name! All I could think of was “That’s where all the bratty kids live!”) Anyhoo, it was a really cool church out in the middle of nowhere with the most amazing grounds. This picture is of a giant stone crown with seats all around the outer edge, and a pulpit-like part where the cousins are standing. There was also a little cemetery as you drove in, with the tiniest church I have ever seen (and believe me, I’ve seen some small churches!) Then you walk and walk back into the woods and come to this natural amphitheater, with about five rows of stair-step seating sinking down to a small stage, with moss all over the rocks and trees growing all around. It was a really cool place.

This particular morning they were having a local contemporary Christian trio singing (which Kirsten told me was a bit odd, since apparently they’re Catholic – but it wasn’t apparent because they only did pop Christian standards – Michael W. Smith and Steven Curtis Chapman kind of stuff). So there wasn’t really a service, just a concert, which was a bit disappointing, and there was a potluck after, which we skipped because Logan was getting cranky. But I was glad we went, just because it was such a cool place.

Then on the way home we decided it was time for me to experience The Creamery, apparently the best little pizza place in Rushford. It was good pizza, and on the way out I stopped for gas and got a picture of the Rushford sign:

Not exactly Hollywood, but still cool!

When we got back to Joel’s I tried to settle the girls down by watching Anne of Green Gables. My girls had seen it before, so they were more interested in everything there was to do on the farm (and so led Lauren astray), and Evin was too much the tomboy to watch such a girly movie, so that didn’t last long, and soon I was alone with the movie playing in the background while I read “Anne of Windy Poplars” which I’d found in the school room (I haven’t read that one in years!). This was my “more than five minutes” of quiet alone time.

This was eventually broken by Joel coming in and saying, “I have a surprise for you behind the barn!” A little nervous, I said, “You’re not giving me a cow, are you?” (they have a reputation now for giving me livestock)

But what he’d put together was a good old-fashioned hayride! They had been moving haybales out behind the barn, and he’d left a few on the wagon, set out like seats for me and the girls. Kirsten stayed behind to watch Logan (who was napping), but the rest of us (and Kirsten’s dad, who drove in just at that moment, and the girls begged him to join us) got to ride out to the pasture behind the tractor! (And yes, I had Montgomery Gentry’s “International Harvester” running through my head the whole time – “chugga-lugga-luggin’ five miles an hour!”)

Then the only thing left to check off our “to-do” list for the weekend was ride the pony. Hannah had been waiting for this for months, and now that it was finally time, she was grinning from ear to ear (but still a little nervous). Evin expertly led Moondust around the pasture, and I walked alongside. There was not really much to be nervous about – he is just about the laziest horse there ever was, but I was in Mommy Mode, and wanted to be by her just in case.

Then it was Naomi’s turn, but she was a lot more nervous than Hannah (and a lot less horse crazy), and she asked to be done almost right away.

By then it was pushing five o’clock, so it was time to hit the road. Naomi fell asleep before we even got to the highway.

An hour later I stopped the van, turned around, and said, “Naomi, we’re at Burger King.” She could barely keep her eyes open, but she was grinning from ear to ear as she fumbled with her seat buckles and climbed out of the van.

My kids rarely eat out, and Burger King is an extra-special treat, since we usually go to Subway or someplace at least a little bit healthier – but after the way we’d eaten all weekend, I figured it wouldn’t really make much difference, and decided to treat the girls. They were a little disappointed that there was no play room, but they got over it quickly and each ate a whole fish sandwich (for some reason they always want fish sandwiches when we go out to eat – odd little ducks!) then “Back in the Saddle Again” . . .

When we finally did get home, it was to a Sam brim-full of tales of his fun weekend with Dad, toys everywhere, and a Josiah and Elaina delighted to have their Mommy back again. Unfortunately, Peter was not so glad to see me just then, since we arrived just as he was about to put the kids in bed, and our arrival got them all jazzed up and not exactly in the mood for going to sleep peacefully. But they did finally settle down, the toys were easily picked up, and I got to feel glad to be home again – calm, refreshed, and happy.

The Movie Event of the Year!

More anticipated than the latest Batman movie!

Better than the return of Harrison Ford!

It’s . . .

“Josiah Walking”

The Return of NS2

(That’s supposed to be NS (squared), but I can’t make a superscript character in the title bar, which kind of diminishes the effect) Anyway, NS² stands for Not So Shaggy, which is what we call our dog after he’s had his yearly shave!

(He’s still a little self-conscious about it, so he didn’t want to pose for the picture)

So, I get back from my morning walk, and this is what I decide to do. It should only take a half hour or so, right? [Note to self: Shaggy is a large, hairy, GOLDEN RETRIEVER. He has a LOT of hair!!!] It took me two hours, broken into two separate sessions, to shave him (I had to take a break after the first hour to feed the kids breakfast and get ready for my friend Laura and her kids (aka The Happy Weeders) to come over. They come over about once a week for a playdate/weeding session, supposedly so Laura and the kids can learn more about gardening (although I think it’s more for socializing and free veggies – and to be nice to me!) :) The whole time they were here, Shaggy ran around with one side shaved and the other still long – sadly, it was not as dramatic an effect as you would think. I had to point it out to Laura’s kids!)

Anyhoo, nearing the end of the second shaving session Peter arrived home for lunch (surprise! yay!) and found me in the back yard finishing up. He stood there for a few minutes and then stated: “You’re being way too careful.” Of course, the immediate reply in my head was: “That’s because I saw what it looked like when you did it!” but I kept my mouth shut and finished the job. To explain, Peter had shaved Shags the year before, in about 15 minutes – and it looked like it. In his defense, Shaggy was a lot less hairy and hopefully much cooler for the hot summer days; but it really looked like a home-done chop job. Tonight, he looks better than he did when we spent $60 at the groomers (if I do say so myself). Peter is definitely one for practicality, not so much for cosmetics.

A Good Day

You have to be happy on a day when you open your email and find a message entitled, “I Love Your Buns!” (it’s from my friend Chris, who of course is referring to the hamburger bun recipe I shared with her)

But it was a good day in other respects, too. After a long, busy week working on the garage sale, I got to spend most of the day home with just the two youngest kids. I stayed home from church because Elaina was acting soggy and cranky this morning, and we thought she might be coming down with something (thankfully, she’s fine – just a little stressed out from Mom being gone so much). I think Peter also knew I needed a little quiet time at home. Since I’d been gone most of the week, the house was a wreck, and I was really stressed out in the back of my mind about it. I don’t know if anyone else is like this, but I can spend a whole day at home and not notice the mess around me, but if I’m gone all day and come home to it, it just kills me. Probably because I’m already tired and see all of the work I still need to do. Anyway, there was a gigantic stack of dishes, laundry piled up, the floors were desperate for vacuuming, the babes needed baths, and everything just generally needed to be picked up and organized.

So, after Peter took the older three to church, I played with the babes for a half hour until naptime, then made quick work of the aforementioned jobs, and had most of them done by lunchtime when the kids woke up. I actually had time to sew two new tablecloths and look around wondering what else I could do before Peter and the kids came home (at 2:30). So nice! That was exactly what I needed. I am my calm, contented self again

Garage Sale Fun

This weekend was our big three-family garage sale at my friend’s house in town. We spent most of the week preparing, and then of course most of the day Thursday, Friday, and Saturday manning the sale. I didn’t see much of my kids all week – Wednesday they were running around the house where we were setting things up, Thursday Jessica watched them from 7 am until 9pm (we had Bible study that night), Friday one of the other garage sale ladies’ daughter watched them from 10am until 4, and Saturday they stayed home with Peter, and I didn’t get home until almost 2. Elaina was the only one who really showed it, though – she was VERY clingy whenever I left, and apparently wasn’t napping very well. I don’t think I’ll do this again until the kids are older, it’s just too hard on them.

Anyway, the sale was a big success otherwise. Thursday was our best day, with all of the hard-core garage sale shoppers waiting by the doors before we even opened, and coming in a steady stream all day. I don’t think there was more than once or twice when 15 minutes went by without a customer. It was great! Lori’s philosophy seemed to pay off – try to sell a lot of items cheap, rather than a few items at higher prices. We had all clothes 50 cents, and all books for a quarter. It went really well.

Friday was a little slower, but not too much. Mid-afternoon a very pregnant woman came in and bought $47.50 worth of my cloth diapers! Woo-hoo! Even better, though, she said, “Wow, that’s a really good deal!” (which it was). It was great that someone who knew about cloth diapers and what they were really worth was getting them. I was very pleased!

Saturday was the big “Super Sale” – everything was half off (which put all clothes at 25 cents and we had all books at 10 cents – we wanted that stuff gone!!!) We didn’t make as much money (probably partially since we closed up at noon – oh, and probably since someone took our signs down Friday night – once we got them back up (around 9:30) things started to pick up) but we got rid of a lot, and only had one (very full) vanload to take to goodwill. I call that a success!

Now if I can just keep myself from accumulating that much unneccessary stuff again!!!

(In my defense, though, most of it was baby stuff, which I did need last year, but won’t be needing anymore. That doesn’t count.)